A few months back we announced a feature that came by popular request: separate access settings for Online Buddies.
As you already know, the Online Buddy relationship type on Multiply lets you connect with a single individual, without becoming part of their network, and vice versa. This is useful when you want to add someone you may not know that well as a contact: if you don't know them that well, how likely is it that you know the people they know?
Using the new settings, you're able to choose whether to include or exclude your Online Buddies, not only when posting content, but also for sharing your profile information, like your last name, e-mail address, interests and such.
I have been adding new contacts as online buddies. The problem is that all my other contacts from the pre-development era are just whatever, since it didn't matter beyond superficiality then. Now, they get p*ssed when I want to change them to online buddies... I've lost a few friends that way! It'll just have to be a progressive effort... *sigh*
I like the online buddy status as I can add unknowns that way at first. Then after we get to know each other, and I feel comfortable in sharing more, I ask them if I can change the status. When people ask to change me to online buddy, I understand exactly why and therefore am glad to do so. No drama is necessary.
A buddy to me is someone closer to me then a friend, and that was the opposite of the meaning of the Online Buddy option so I understand. So, when it was introduced, I had loads of problems with the Friends I had, as many were in fact Buddies (not MP-style!), and now I have few Online Buddies, and thus my postigns are to thsoe too....
I think the classification of Buddies and Friends is wrong, as Buddies are normally closer related to someone then Friends, and as MP is classifying them the other way around, it's confusing as it is now................
My opinion, nothing more (and once adjusted, I can live with it (so don't go and change it again PLEASE!))
I like it. I find it very usefull myself as it's a very handy way of getting to know someone without revealing all the info you reserve for your close friends and family. It's got legs and it struts on it's own. Well done Multiply !
When I deleted my old account and started a new one I invited everyone as an online buddy and no drama was involved. I agree with the others, in that to me a buddy is far more special than a friend.
This is a very helpful feature as I post some very personal blogs and photos that are only meant for close friends and not for online buddies that I don't know personally. It''s great!
Zebaron is right. Identifying someone as online buddy when they want you to be his/her friend is somewhat offensive. I would like to suggest that each member will be able to categorize a contact to a relationship unknown to the member to be invited.. and that he can do the same. I mean, he may want me to be his friend but I'd only like people I do not know that much to be online buddies. If he does not know which category he belongs.. he will not be offended, right?
I use it and like it because many good friends chose the "online buddy" value rather than friend, they are none the less friends that I wish to share with.
I have been adding new contacts as online buddies. The problem is that all my other contacts from the pre-development era are just whatever, since it didn't matter beyond superficiality then. Now, they get p*ssed when I want to change them to online buddies... I've lost a few friends that way! It'll just have to be a progressive effort... *sigh*
i know what you mean.......I try and make my friends those I know in real life and online buddys would be the rest. But for some reason that upsets people.
Zebaron is right. Identifying someone as online buddy when they want you to be his/her friend is somewhat offensive. I would like to suggest that each member will be able to categorize a contact to a relationship unknown to the member to be invited.. and that he can do the same. I mean, he may want me to be his friend but I'd only like people I do not know that much to be online buddies. If he does not know which category he belongs.. he will not be offended, right?
but that would take away the how are we conected network thing ex. like if you view my site and i go to view history cereilah your friend zebaron's sister i like knowing this
i use it but i do think its backwards to a point a buddy is closer than a friend in my way of thinking, in the real world anyways, so it did take a little adjusting to get use to it . re-classifing was easy as long as the other person accepted the change, which was a problem for a very few. nope didnt add more contacts afterwards -
I have to disagree with the idea that a buddy is closer than a friend. To me a buddy is someone you might hang out with and talk to or do things with from time to time, but a friend is someone you would trust with your life. I think it is a matter of interpretation. I like this feature because I have a way to add new people that I would like to get to know, yet I can exclude them from some of my more personal blogs and from seeing pictures of my children or things like that. I think it is an excellent feature.
A buddy to me is someone closer to me then a friend ... I think the classification of Buddies and Friends is wrong, as Buddies are normally closer related to someone then Friends
I have to disagree with the idea that a buddy is closer than a friend.
I'm glad I'm not the only one who finds this odd? A buddy is someone you like to hang out with, maybe have a beer, watch the game on tv, shoot pool, go shopping in the mall, whatever. A friend is all this and more. A friend is someone with whom you share secrets, someone with whom you wouldn't mind going on long family vacations together, someone you can count on in both good times and bad, someone who won't walk away from the relationship just because of hurt feelings and misunderstandings, someone you would trust with your life. I think you guys are confusing friends with acquaintances. I have lots of acquaintances, but very few friends. I don't know why so many people get the two confused - unless acquaintance is just too long a word to say in the real world.
I love online buddies. If someone I don't know wants to be my contact, I can welcome him/her without feeling a pressure to share family photos and such. I have a chance to get to know someone over time.
This change came shortly after I joined, so I didn't have to worry about hurting anyone's feelings. It gave me the ability to change some posts with access to individuals only, so that they could go to contacts - friends and family. The only relationship I had to change at the time was an upgrade because one friend invited me as an online buddy since that's how we met. When I told him I wanted to change access on my posts, he agreed that we should change the Multiply relationship to friends, since that's what we have become in real life.
Haven't used it and won't. I think it's insulting. I am buddy to a couple of people that I've know for a while and intend to ask to be upgraded to friend. When I invite a person, it is because I think they are interesting. That means I've checked them out. If I add them, it will be as friends. And I don't add people unless I've checked them out. If I find that I was wrong, I have the option to delete them. That may also be insulting, but at least that way they KNOW where they stand with me. I just don't like the idea of being able to insult people right off the bat by inferring that they are not good enough to be considered a friend.
Haven't used it and won't. I think it's insulting. I am buddy to a couple of people that I've know for a while and intend to ask to be upgraded to friend. When I invite a person, it is because I think they are interesting. That means I've checked them out. If I add them, it will be as friends. And I don't add people unless I've checked them out. If I find that I was wrong, I have the option to delete them. That may also be insulting, but at least that way they KNOW where they stand with me. I just don't like the idea of being able to insult people right off the bat by inferring that they are not good enough to be considered a friend.
To me it doesn't make a difference, if I have them on a *friends* list or a *buddy* list, it's just thats thats how they were added or they added me. I treasure all of them either way and I visit each of them, no more or less, depends on who blogs more than the other.
I respond to some more than others only because they comment on my page or blog more than others, but some of my friends or online buddies, whoever they may be, have more time to be online than the others.
When I visit them, I don't look to see if they are classified as a friend or buddy.
It has nothing to do with not being good enough. It has to do more with not knowing someone well enough. I'd rather not give access to certain things just because I saw someone's site. Been through it on Xanga where I had everything public. I'm so glad that now I have time to build trust with an online buddy (something I can't do with someone who is not a contact), so that maybe one day we can grow to be friends. I've made some great friendships this way.
There are certain types (anal) of people who will use this application, but really, wtf cares about "buddy" or "friend" other than some anal type? C'mon, gimme a break!
i haven't really used it yet. i have some online buddies, but if i didn't trust them in the first place i wouldn't have added them as contacts, so i don't un-include them in any posts.
what i'd really like is a fan contact setting where people could add my public posts to their inbox feed without me having to see anything of theirs unless i also added them as a fan.
it works tremendously good for me :-) I can easily change all the access restriction one by one. If only there is a page that display all my posting with access restriction buttons beside which allow me to choose with, I believe this will be a faster way to set the desired access restriction that I wish to set.
I still think the option to keep your email private should be for all contacts. sorry just my opinion. It is already provided for multiply and if we wanna give it to a contact then we can..
what i'd really like is a fan contact setting where people could add my public posts to their inbox feed without me having to see anything of theirs unless i also added them as a fan.
I still think the option to keep your email private should be for all contacts
I agree completely. For that reason, I am ALL for the OnLine Bud system as we do finally have a means to close up the availability of personal info which MP requires we furnish in order to be a member, then limits our control of the availability of that data. I don't believe that info should be available to anyone, friend, sister, or long lost whoever till we feel comfortable in swapping that info. Call me whatever, but there is only one individual in MP that I know personally, face to face. We, for the most part, are cyberfriends/buds which is a whole different relationship than the couple I live next to, the gal who lives across the street, of which neither know or have access to my email, or the long-time personal friends of some 20+ years who live across town or across the country. The second element of the online bud feature is the fact that I don't get all the alerts from their network...keeping the mailbox realistic and manageable! That feature, if I'm not mistaken, was already implemented prior to this phase that is being referred to. Don't get me wrong...I feel I have developed some very sound and lasting friendships thru this median and cherish that. But, that took time and conversations (history) to develop a long term aspect as to where they "really" are mentally. Do I share my email with them! Some of them, Yes!...And it was by 'our' understanding, not a preconceived idea by someone else!
Gotta bring up one element of the online bud that I think should be considered...not for my sake as it would make no difference to me, but for those that may be directly affected. For posting anything, there should be an option for "online bud's" within "Network". As it is now, the only way they have access to those posts is if we tick ALL elements of "Network" to include friends, family members, and professional contacts. I'm sure there are "professional" communities here...as I'm sure there are members who would like the capacity to post something for their "Network" of general/fun/down home nature (out of the professional realm), excluding their professional contacts...That's an area I feel needs more consideration, or latitude.
It was annoying when it was first introduced because all the blogs had to be reset and then flooded the message board. Now, it's just another box to "click" after writing.
I have no feelings about it either way, but still, I'm glad that you keep trying to improve; which is more than can be said for some "other" networking sites.
What's the point in adding extra settings for online buddies. If you don't want to share it with online buddies then don't add them at all as your contacts. Whats the point of being added as online buddy if your not going to be shard with anything at all.
Some people might need this feature. But for me, it useless since my contact list is filled with people i haven't met face to face. So far they're nice to me, and there's no way that i downgrade our relationship to online buddy. Even so, the feature doesn't bother me at all. Thanks for the improvement. :-)
I honestly don't understand the social difference between a "buddy" and an "online buddy". When a buddy comes online isn't he/she then an "online buddy"? Unless it is referred to people I just know from the internet... Anyway, I never used it.
The problem is that all my other contacts from the pre-development era are just whatever, since it didn't matter beyond superficiality then. Now, they get p*ssed when I want to change them to online buddies... I've lost a few friends that way!
Yep - that's why I don't really use the feature. Besides, I've real friends who prefer to be "online buddies" because they don't want notifications of posts by my network - or it being notified of theirs. I use advanced posting (individuals) when I only want some of my contacts to see a post.
At first I didn't know about how adding online buddy worked in the scheme of things so I just added many as friends like I did "over there". We had a feature called "ADD" over there and you could just add someone to your list so you could read their blogs but not really communicate with them . And I liked that, its good for some blogs that are very informative but not much else. So I use the online buddy status here for things like that or........for new people I'm not sure of. I get alot of invites because I post alot of recipes and herbal things so many want to read them. And thats ok but I don't feel they need to be in my friends list. Now my friends are the ones I yak with and share my life with. They are closer to me. So anyone new , now, starts out as an online buddy and then might change over to a friend. Honestly there have been very few Ive needed to do that with. It seems online buddy is a good term for those here you don't connect with closely but would like to know ........like an acquaintance. :)
I'm glad I'm not the only one who finds this odd? A buddy is someone you like to hang out with, maybe have a beer, watch the game on tv, shoot pool, go shopping in the mall, whatever. A friend is all this and more. A friend is someone with whom you share secrets, someone with whom you wouldn't mind going on long family vacations together, someone you can count on in both good times and bad, someone who won't walk away from the relationship just because of hurt feelings and misunderstandings, someone you would trust with your life. I think you guys are confusing friends with acquaintances. I have lots of acquaintances, but very few friends. I don't know why so many people get the two confused - unless acquaintance is just too long a word to say in the real world.
Well, then we disagree, as a buddy to me is someone who I share secrets with, who I fight for when he's in trouble or is having problems, were a friend is someone, at least to me, and many others, who can be friends at for instance a soccerclub (we refer to that as a football club btw), a cardclub, a swimclub or the like, but who are more distant then a buddy.
I -like- to hang out with a friend, I -love- hanging out with a buddy....... I -like- to have abeer with a friend, were I -enjoy- having a beer with a buddy.......
I go on holidays with a buddy, not with a friend. I pay a buddies holiday, not for a friends holiday, I would give my wallet to a buddy, not to a friend.
One go's out with ones buddies, and return home safely with a buddy, when one is too drunk to find the keyhole then an buddy is opening the door for you, were a friend will let you lay on the doorstep.
As a friend can hurt ones feelings, a buddy never will even thinking of hurting ones feelings, a disagreement with a friend can end a friendship, a disagreement with a buddy will be rare, and when it happends it will be a friendly disagreement.
But then, it may be due to the different interpretation of the definition of buddy and friend between Europeans and Americans........ I am from Europe, the Netherlands, Amsterdam to be more precise.
And no, I am not confusing buddies with acquaintances, those are possibly friends of friends to me. An acquaintance can never can be as close as a friend, and much lesser then a buddy.
It shows people have different perceptions of different definitions, and how esy it can be to have misunderstandings about people...................... (grins)
I have several family members here, not just people I've met on the internet. I use it for both posting and inbox management. Not only my own but to avoid flooding my online buddies inboxes with useless family mail. Thanks.
It's nice.. but.. it would be nice.. if the invitee got to choose the relationship.. instead of the one asking.. I get some weird invites.. and, decline.. based on how they list themselves.
It's all I use so my posts don't go out to people I don't know (or theirs come to me). Was the "online buddy" designation that was missing from network ever get added? (Haven't had a chance to check yet since getting back)
i wish you guys can come up with some sort of like a chat area but something that could also be saved like, right now, we're chatting in the blog page, its good too but it would be nicer if theres a new feature
I wanted certain photos just to be seen by "friends"..those I had selected that I could trust.now I find that everyone can see them..even though I keep setting certain groups of photos for friends only. This has caused me great concern knowing that so many people have been able to view these photos and I fear that they may be used to my detriment. And I do mean fear..knowing that people you have not said could see certain groups, in fact can This seems to me to be a real security issue..and I kind of feel violated to be honest. I do think something needs to be done.
I really like this new buddy feature. I like to post some blogs that are only for my firends, and then I post other blogs for everyone. I send out a "card" to my friends only as a blog post-I like it alot. I also like adding someone as buddy first if I am not sure of them, and then can later upgrade to friend-great feature-thank you alot
It hasnt made much difference to me... Probably because I was happy with Posting for Contacts only or for Network.. and if I had to choose only some, I used the Advanced.
Is the feature as useful as you hoped it would be? Is it more? No and NO
Have you added more contacts you otherwise wouldn't have been able to before? NO... I don't add anyone I am not familiar with... the category I choose for them doesn't matter at all. :-/
Were you able to reclassify any existing contacts following the introduction of the feature? I never needed to in the first place.
It's all I use so my posts don't go out to people I don't know (or theirs come to me). Was the "online buddy" designation that was missing from network ever get added? (Haven't had a chance to check yet since getting back)
I post almost everything for contacts only. Sometimes, I'll post just for certain friends. It's a nice option, though, even though I don't really use it.
I think It would be better to have a "Blocked List" user, instead of checking all your group of friends who can view your datas. It will also be useful if you just want 1 or a couple of persons not to view your site.
I hope someone reads this and can give me a clue. Is there any guidance for customize my blog page. It is very wide whereas the text is narrow and gets lost in the space. I saw helpful hints once but for some strange reason i can't find that place again. Can you will you please assist me? thank you
I was very pleased when this was introduced (not surprising, as I was one of those who kept badgering multiply for this...) and have been making use of this feature. There are several people that I only know through Multiply and so wouldn't have dared to add them as Friends at this stage, but having them as Online Buddies means I feel safe in taking time to get to know them, I can easily choose which of my posts they can see, and I know they don't get automatic access to my email address. This has been great, it means we have a chance to gradually get to know one another in a safe and non-threatening way.
One thing that surprised me though: it seems that when I'm visiting an online buddy's site, if I click on the headshot of someone who has responded to their post I can see if this person is my online buddy's contact and, if so, it tells me how they are connected. E.g. Joe Bloggs is your online buddy Jane Smith's cousin. Now, of course it's interesting to me to know that, but I'm not sure I really want all my online buddies to have this sort of info about me, and I wasn't expecting it to be available. We have the option to hide our Contacts list from online buddies, but that privacy is spoiled by the availability of this kind of info through headshots.
And yes, as discussed in MUDS, there is some confusion about where online buddies fit in when you post to Network, it's not very obvious from the way it's presented just now, so I think there is room for improvement there.
Apart from these minor issues, a very good feature from my point of view which I'm finding very helpful.
EDITED: Ok, I'm not sure really what the situation is re seeing connections in headshots - I've just gone onto the site of one of my OBs and found that this doesn't happen there, but I have another OB in whose case it does happen. Can it be because she is part of my Network? I'm a bit confused now.
Haven't used it and won't. I think it's insulting. I am buddy to a couple of people that I've know for a while and intend to ask to be upgraded to friend. When I invite a person, it is because I think they are interesting. That means I've checked them out. If I add them, it will be as friends. And I don't add people unless I've checked them out. If I find that I was wrong, I have the option to delete them. That may also be insulting, but at least that way they KNOW where they stand with me. I just don't like the idea of being able to insult people right off the bat by inferring that they are not good enough to be considered a friend.
if a user has post,blog videos set for everyone yeea i can see how you check them out first but if them dont how is it you check them out?? im online buddy first then friends
One thing that surprised me though: it seems that when I'm visiting an online buddy's site, if I click on the headshot of someone who has responded to their post I can see if this person is my online buddy's contact and, if so, it tells me how they are connected. E.g. Joe Bloggs is your online buddy Jane Smith's cousin. Now, of course it's interesting to me to know that, but I'm not sure I really want all my online buddies to have this sort of info about me, and I wasn't expecting it to be available. We have the option to hide our Contacts list from online buddies, but that privacy is spoiled by the availability of this kind of info through headshots.
Ok, I'm not sure really what the situation is re seeing connections in headshots - I've just gone onto the site of one of my OBs and found that this doesn't happen there, but I have another OB in whose case it does happen. Can it be because she is part of my Network? I'm a bit confused now.
This is rather interesting - and I'm confused too. You should not, imo, see: "Jane is your online buddy John Doe's cousin". What I sometimes have found when Jane commented on John's page is something like: "Jane is your cousin Mary's friend Jack's girlfriend". If there's no such connection (i.e. the only contact Jane and I share is John) - unknown to me because my Inbox is never set to more than own contacts and groups - I get for Jane: "Not in your network". What I mean is that some of your contacts are perhaps also each others' contacts with a closer relationship than online buddy between them, and yes, then Jane is part of your network. You should, however, see how, with no mention of what she is to your online buddy.
I just checked on an online buddy's page. For one of her friends, I get "not in your network". For another, likewise a friend to her, I get: "Your friend X's friend". We're connected through X, not through my online buddy.
Over time on Multiply, I've formed relationships with a lot of my extended network. Some who are friends of cousins, some who are far enough that they aren't even in my network at all (but with whom I've interacted in the reply sections of posts from mutual network contacts). Most live halfways accross the country from me, but there is a group of us, most of whom are 2 or 3 or 4 links away in my direct network, who have become a sort of support network for each other.
The Online buddy feature has been really nice in this group for giving ourselves a more direct link to each other, so we can build on the friendship, without imposing on or confusing the rest of our real-life direct contacts and diluting our networks. It lets me post things to a narrower network for privacy, while still including this network of amazing women, but without including their friends and family who have never met me.
Over time on Multiply, I've formed relationships with a lot of my extended network. Some who are friends of cousins, some who are far enough that they aren't even in my network at all (but with whom I've interacted in the reply sections of posts from mutual network contacts). Most live halfways accross the country from me, but there is a group of us, most of whom are 2 or 3 or 4 links away in my direct network, who have become a sort of support network for each other.
The Online buddy feature has been really nice in this group for giving ourselves a more direct link to each other, so we can build on the friendship, without imposing on or confusing the rest of our real-life direct contacts and diluting our networks. It lets me post things to a narrower network for privacy, while still including this network of amazing women, but without including their friends and family who have never met me.
I like how you broke that down into three steps, like we're all a bunch of 7 year olds. OK, well, to be honest:
